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Don’t you think that this lemur is loving it’s tails so much, that without it, it would be lost? When I chose this image, the face just made me think of someone longing for their lost love. The expression on it’s face says the story as I see it. It is an image I took in Beale Park, UK.  I photographed this lovely creature in Beal Park, UK.

As we discussed in previous entries, human beings are not solitary creatures, we need the company of others to get the contact, the validation, the connectiveness. This is a biological imperative, as from ancient times we needed the help of others to survive in the wilderness. Often we chose to take time out away from others in the hopes that we can re-group, we can find out own centre again.

How do you feel when you are alone? Can you be alone and yet be in company? Can you be in company and yet be alone? Can you look in the mirror and accept the person looking back at you? Can you experience your whole being and be at peace? Do you get the connection you need from others? How do you connect with others? Do you have enough of a connection with yourself, to be ready to connect with others? Have you got your own support network to rely on?

If you were to put yourself in the centre and you mapped out all the people who are your connections who would make the inner circle? and who would be on the next level of connection; and the next, and the next, until you find the outer edges of your own system? If you were the sun, as the centre of your own solar system and with each planet you created an orbit around yourself and for each planet you had the 1st layer of people within the gravity of Mercury, then the next group in the gravity of Venus, then the Earth and so on, how many layers would you have? And within those layers, what is it you get from those humans? And how hard is it to accept that which they are telling you?

With my clients, I often ask them to draw their support network, but then I also have a question for them – if you had to put someone from your network on a deserted island, without food and water and the island surrounded by sharks, would you put anyone on there? Some of my clients make that choice, and some find this task ridiculous, what I am in fact asking them to do is make a judgement of who in their world is so toxic, that perhaps they need to be left behind.

When it comes to sense of self, we create our own perception of ourselves from the people who surround us, therefore if you want to have a better view of self, some people need to be let go. By looking at the networks we spoke about so far, you should by now have a few structures identified around you, and now I invite you to go back to those drawings, maps, etc and sift through, who stays and who goes?

Are you ready to love yourself?

As always join in the conversation in a comment, or journal your thoughts. We are ready to evolve, join us on the journey of discovery.